Day 11: Roast Beef à la Ron Popeil

I am a sucker for infomercials. I suppose I should be embarrassed to admit that but come on, who doesn't love a good story? The overweight, middle-aged man who magically drops 100 lbs all because he found THE magic pill! The family on the verge of bankruptcy discovers THE Internet secret that makes them millions! And how cold-hearted must you be to deny your 2-year old the headstart of reading at a 4th grade level for just three easy payments of $49.95?! Of course these claims are all true because it says so right there on the screen, "These are not paid actors" (right next to the words in much tinier print, "Results not typical").

Anyone who watched TV in the '80s will tell you that Ron Popeil, inventor and founder of Ronco, is THE ORIGINAL KING of infomercials. This is the man who first introduced us to the chop-o-matic (and subsequently the veg-o-matic and dial-o-matic), spray-on hair color for men, a way to scramble an egg while still inside the shell, and kitchen knives that cut through shoe leather. Popeil could sell a car to a blind man and thanks to the Home Shopping Network, he sold me a Showtime Rotisserie. (All together now: "Set it...and forget it!")

Kidding aside, I love my Showtime Rotisserie. You see, when I was about 8 years old, my parents decided to adopt a healthier lifestyle and became vegetarian, which meant we kids also stopped eating meat. They no longer bought, cooked or ate beef, poultry or seafood and so I never learned how to properly cook those things. (Of course being the rebel carnivore that I was, I ate meat every chance I got when my parents weren't around but that is a story for another day.) The rotisserie did everything Ron Popeil promised and for the first time, I was able to roast beef, chicken, even fish to near perfection at home.

I say "near perfection" because I used the weight or size of the meat and suggested cooking times as my guide for figuring out when it was done. Most of the time that worked pretty well but was not reliable for oddly-shaped cuts and whole birds. Then last year The Geek gave me THE must-have gadget for the carnivorous cook - a meat thermometer. Now every beef roast is a perfect 140F and I can rest assured that my rotisserie chickens have reached the required 170F for safe consumption. I've since gone on to purchase an oven timer with probe so that when I roast in the oven, I don't have to repeatedly open the oven door and stab the meat to take a reading. And recently The Geek gave me an audible timer with remote sensor so that I can monitor the temperature of food on the grill from the comfort of my sofa.

That is my long introduction to what is a very simple but elegant meal - Ribeye roast beef with a side of corn and green beans. I seasoned it liberally with kosher salt and then loaded it onto the spit. Two hours later, the kids and I enjoyed a delicious, crisply browned, perfectly medium-rare dinner.

Busy Mom Modifications and Tips

• I never remember to take meat out of the freezer the day or two before we are going to eat it. Usually around 3 p.m. I think "What should we have for dinner tonight?" and then I pull out the first thing I find. I used to microwave frozen food to thaw it but that usually had disastrous consequences. Alton Brown recommends immersing frozen food in water to thaw it quickly. Put the meat in a zip top bag, remove as much air as possible, and then place in a container large enough so that you can fully immerse the meat. Fill the container with cool water then leave the tap on so that it drips very slowly. Thirty minutes to an hour is enough time to sufficiently thaw 2 - 3 lbs of beef or chicken.
• I don't recommend that you do this but will share this tidbit anyway. I forgot to take the turkey out of the freezer early last week and so on Wednesday afternoon I thawed the 12 lb bird using this method in about three hours. Again, I don't recommend you rely on this method but I was desperate and no one has complained of food poisoning yet.
• Roasting time guidelines, such as 15 min/lb for chicken, can be misleading. Those guidelines assume that the meat is starting at a specific temperature (might be room temperature, might be a refrigerator-chilled 40F) and depends on the ambient temperature. If you're like me and have forgotten to take the food out of the freezer far enough in advance, the outside might feel like it is thawed but the inside is still frozen. There have been many times I cut into a chunk of beef that was nearly burned on the outside and bloody on the inside. It is times like this that a meat thermometer is worth its weight in gold.
• If you cook a lot of meat and don't own a meat thermometer, or if you just want to make a perfect roast, you really should get one. The fork style is the most versatile (it can be used in a rotisserie, the oven and the grill). It is also the most inconvenient since you have to stab the meat and wait for the reading every time you want to check the temperature. You lose heat and juices each time as well. When roasting in the oven, I love my Polder Oven Thermometer with probe because it truly is a "set it and forget it" device since it has both a timer as well as a temperature alarm.

The Results

Pretty much everything I make in the rotisserie turns out fabulous.

Ratings

• From the moment the kids first smell the roast, they are eager to eat.
• Difficulty: It takes a little know-how, but with the proper tools (a rotisserie and a meat thermometer), it is easy to make a fantastic, elegant entrée.
• Time to prepare: Depends on the size of the roast and the starting temperature. I usually plan 40 minutes per pound and this includes prep, roasting and resting time.
• Prognosis: This is a favorite appliance and meal

My Shopping List

Nothing - I made do with what I had on hand.

The Tally

• The day's tally: $0
• Total this month so far: $143